MARCH 11, 2021 — It’s hardly a hidden gem, this stretch of beachfront in Walton County on the Florida panhandle. It’s one of the fastest growing regions in the state.
And yet, in all my years of traveling to Florida, I’d never ventured here, didn’t know much about it — until last month, when I was shopping for an easy-to-reach, drivable destination in Florida, closer than the southwest corner of the state where I usually vacation.
Texans, Georgians and Alabamans have been descending for years on this stretch of the Emerald Coast, so-called because of the Gulf of Mexico’s gorgeous green hue here.
‘Seaside – A Beautiful Disaster’
Let’s preface this quick rundown of my very brief visit to Seaside today, by saying simply…What The F@ck?!
As in, WTF did y’all do to this legendary town?
It’s hard to adore the gorgeous architecture, the genius urban design, the brilliant overall vision of such an iconic place…when it’s being absolutely destroyed by a rotating door of entitled mobs.
The town of Seaside is in many ways a victim of its own success. They didn’t know that by positioning themselves as this elitist, exclusive haven of wannabe 1%ers, it would instead turn into the babysitter of the wannabe 1%er’s teenage infants.
Upon entering Seaside today…on a relatively slow Monday afternoon…we were almost taken out by an out of control bike, as the teenage rider face planted on the sidewalk. A few steps up we catch a cringeworthy interaction between almost naked little girls and a Jeep spilling horny dudes out. Next is a packed golf cart pulled over wasting one of our precious Sheriff’s resources and then a bunch of guys pouring cheap vodka into water bottles…oh yea…we haven’t even made it into Seaside yet, this is just the walk from the car.
In town center, it just looks like a high school lunch hour riot. On its surface it might seem harmless…after all, these are rich white, honor roll, sports playing, name brand wearing suburban kids…what’s the big deal?
Well, I’m talking with a business owner, who is telling me about a fight that broke out last night in front of Dawson’s Ice Cream…and how a hundred+ kids converged instantaneously on the scene, with no police to be seen (Whale’s Tail seems to suck resources away at night)…the shop owner conveyed a concern about the fragility of the situation…in his words ‘we are one broken window away from a bad situation’.
I’m not here to be over dramatic…or judgmental … hey, we were all dumb kids at some point. But Seaside put the steel curtain of fun down on their beaches, not stopping the problem, simply consolidating it to the public square. I don’t blame them for this situation…I really don’t even see a way out of it at this point…but I do urge anyone with a brain and a heart that’s involved with the town to try to find a logical solution to what seems to be a ticking time bomb.
I’ve lived here for a while…it’s worse than ever…and these people are just getting started.